By Simi A Mira
Some fashion looks are so out there that they’re classified ingenious. Or a step further: genius. Some, on the other hand, are just awful. Nothing against the wearers, though. As a matter of fact, they’re pretty brave for showing up the way they did… although many of us might have preferred they show up “fashionably late” to the photo and change into something… you know, fashionable.
The Man Bun
If you’ve got the balls to wear your hair long, wear it down. The only way you can pull this look off is if you’ve got a sword in your hand so you look like a sexy samurai. In other words: if you’re already a badass, you can use the look to layer on the badassness on very specific occasions. But you can’t pair it with the suit and gentlemanly appearance. While this is a bold fashion look, it ultimately doesn’t work.
It’s basically been proven that eyes are the window to the soul. So if you wear this hat, you are soulless. Unless you’re going for the satanic look or you’re a ginger who already doesn’t have a soul (just kidding!) leave these babies out of your shopping bag. Trust me—you won’t regret it. This look is quickly fading. Help put it out of its mercy.
Shirts That Look Like You Drew On Them With Sharpie… Except You Didn’t
Usually offering “wise” insights, these shirts have the powerful capacity to annoy everybody within a 20-foot radius. They say less is more, but if you’re really looking for less, just grab your own Sharpie and draw on your own white shirt. People may still be annoyed, but hey—at least it’s DIY. If there’s any excuse for annoying people, it’s doing it on your own turf and learning good fashion trends from scratch. You do you. Don’t do shit that looks like you that you paid too much money for.
A Lot Of Fur
A little here, a little there can add body and softness to your appearance. It’s also a good material for flipping winter the bird. Too much, though, and you look like you’ve raided the circus. Just think of the poor animals. Your spectators sure will be. In this case, they won’t be thinking “Sexy!” They’ll be thinking “Cruella De Vil.” And then they’ll probably run away. Let’s be honest. Cruelly honest.
Trippy Space Kitten Shit
If you want to relive the 70’s, just grab a pair of bellbottoms. Really. If you want the sexy animal look, go Playboy Bunny. Hell, add some 70’s flair and color with multi-colored bunny ears or tights. Just don’t scare the shit out of us with the dark shades, excessive Mardi Gras beads, and ridiculous threads. On a side note: if you want to clear the street for any reason at all, this is a great look. It’s probably just as effective for fending off unwanted attention as those Anti-Pervert Hairy Leggings. (Seriously, go check them out.)